Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Of Birthdays and Lessons in Life


April is one month that has so many red letter days in my calendar..i call it the "birthday month". My wife, daughter,
younger sister, grandmom, brother-in-law are all April born. I have also close friends who are part of my April birthday
list.

Last April 19 was the birthday of Elaine.

I heard that she celebrated her birthday away from her family because of work and I felt sad for her.

Because people who know her well, will know, she'd rather be with family.

Elaine is a close friend of mine, though our relationship seem distant.

This gentle, spirited, funny and loving woman is the mother of my two precious children - Rachel and Chito. Elaine and I were once married. It was a relationship that, in hindsight, was unfair for her from the start. I was young, reckless and irresponsible. Our marriage was annulled and have long since lived our separate lives.

Despite our painful past, Elaine remained to be a familiar friend of my family... and as time healed the emotional scars, we have evolved to become friends -bonded by our love for our children.

Our journey together may have long been over,but the memories all told, have made me become a better man.She has taught me that for a relationship to prosper, it must be a two-way partnership. A give and take. Never one way. She made me realize that reaching out is far greater than proving a point. That being gentle means: the laughter and hugs, the i love you's, i miss you's and those little simple things in life; and that they are very important, for they add the solid footing and foundation in a relationship.

She made me realize that family matters the most in life, and the ties that keep the family intact,comes in different shape and form. She also taught me that when one listens with a heart, the relationship becomes deeper. And often than not, a simple voice call to say "I am sorry" can save a relationship from breaking apart.

I am now happily married with Lyne, whom i love so dear. I try make it a point as much as possible, to call her...hear her voice and to listen with my heart...this routine has kept us together despite the ups and downs.

Today's blog is my way of saying, thanks for everything Elaine.

And that i still do think of you particularly on days like today, when i reminisce my youth and remember, lessons i have learned.

2 comments:

rachellemr said...

All these wisdom could only come with age. :D Indeed, April is the month to be born! I love reading your blogs, it paints a different side of you.

marge said...

ahay kasubo. :-) but to add to your thoughts, bro, what i really admire about our dear elaine is that she doesnt "dwell", she moves on. her sense of humour and love for life has always been her trade mark strength. she is above all a survivor. amen amen!